舊生︰報告,不是這麼寫地。
                                                                               
新生︰你說什麼?
                                                                               
舊生︰我說,報告----並不是這麼寫地。
                                                                               
新生︰那應該怎麼寫啊?

                              
舊生︰一句話----剪貼COPY。
                                                                               
新生︰何為剪貼COPY?
                                                                               
舊生︰剪貼COPY呢,是我心目中浩氣長存地已當偉大退學生比爾蓋茲先生已經解釋
      過地。但是如果你想再多了解一點,那就跟我抄兩份報告。
                                                                               
                                                                               
新生︰抄什麼報告吶﹗看你的樣子,還不是在這作研究?﹗
                                                                               
舊生︰研究只是我的表面工作,我真正的身分是一位"延畢僧"﹗
                                                                               
新生︰延畢生?﹗
                                                                               
舊生︰從事如何有效地浪費國家資源地研究工作。這張是我地學生證。
                                                                               
新生︰國立台X大學----動物研究所?
                                                                               
舊生︰是啊,很動物呦。(發出狼嚎)
                                                                               
新生︰剪剪貼貼你找別人吧。我受過高等教育的。
                                                                    
舊生︰錯啦。你看那個辣妹----
                                                                               
新生︰辣妹又怎麼樣?我是讀書人。

(只見辣妹正瘋狂打報告...突然...)                                                                               

舊生︰不不不不不,哎,你看你看你看你看你看…………噢………
                                                                               
(辣妹打報告打到肌肉抽筋)
                                                                               
兩人︰YEAH﹗
                                                                               
舊生︰如果她會copy地指令就不會發生這種事了。你看----
                                                                                                                                   
(某生作秀按右鍵表演剪下貼上)
                                                                               
舊生︰所以說,COPY的確是----神﹗小姐,有沒有興趣做報告?
                                                                               
辣妹︰神經病﹗
                                                                               
舊生︰你再看看那邊那位四眼田雞----如果他會反白整段COPY下來,論文就不用那麼愁了。所以說,COPY的確是--行﹗哎,四眼兄,有沒有興趣學--
                                                                               
四眼田雞︰行了行了,那邊要去﹗ (丟一份paper,舊生撿起)
                                                                               
新生︰喂,這一份paper我也有份的。
                                                                               
舊生︰你別那麼掃興嘛。 你再看看那邊----
                                                                               
                                                                               
教授︰你寫什麼你,寫個論文寫了一年,你不用畢業了,走﹗
                                                                               
甲生︰對不起,對不起。
                                                                               
教授︰走吧﹗
                                                                               
                                                                               
舊生︰如果那個學生會找論文抄襲的話,哪還用那麼麻煩?﹗
                                                                               
新生︰抄論文?那是違反著作權﹗
                                                                               
                                                                               
舊生︰天下文章一大抄,沒聽過嗎你?﹗COPY絕對是適合男女老幼地,剪剪貼貼只是大家對他地誤解。COPY更加是一門藝術,一種不屈的精神。
     
所以一直以來我都在找方法想將COPY重新包裝起來,使得你們這些升斗小民,
      對於COPY能有更深一層的了解。
 


睿柏(RAYBO),發表於Wed Sep  5 04:13:47 2001    

已收錄在商周出版的《我愛周星馳》一書裡引用自博客來網路書店

                       

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